(1)

I took Mum for a walk

Using her new frame,

Trying not to talk

Lest she forget my name.

I went to get a sister

To help her sit back down

On the rubber cushion for the blister

That came when no one was around.

I said, ‘Did you think I'd gone again?'

She said, 'I didn't know you came.'

Came, didn't, is, isn't, all the same

Pain.

(2)

Mum was rocking to stand up

When I came to the door.

I said, 'I'll try and catch a nurse.'

She said, 'There are traps in the floor.'

And maggots in the carpet

And spiders on the bed

And she didn't think

The rails were right -

The boat might sink,

She said,

At night.

Mum has fallen

Three times this year.

There's nothing wrong

Inside her head,

Just age

And fear,

But I was asked

To sign a paper,

If it came to that,

Not to revive her.

I refused.

How could I live with that.

(3)

Even if there's nothing

Behind her eyes

But pain and fear,

There's still someone,

There's my mother,

Trying to be here.